Most generous benefactor,

I write to you once more to appraise you of my most recent efforts in serving the good of the community – including the business community which particularly concerns you.

I was rudely awoken from my scheduled nap to a scene of dock-side chaos right outside my shop door. I hurried to find out what was afoot and things were dire indeed! There was a ship on fire behind a barricade of barrels, a huge rowdy crowd, a scruffy priest was exhorting everyone to flee for their lives and Mal had just fished a very pale-looking Hailong.

Hailong’s showy clothing&armour set was quite ruined and he was leaking blood, dirty water and innards. Reminded me of a stew I once had. I really should have gotten the recipe.

But I digress. Vladof was keen to try to save Hailong’s life so I lent what aid I could from my modest medical knowledge and he was sufficiently patched up to be able to be carried away to the doctor. Considering Hailong’s importance in the business and entertainment community, I am sure I can count on a measure of gratitude reflected on my monthly stipend.

The trouble seemed to have come from some oversized cats (?) in the hold of the ship. I immediately considered some warm milk with a sleeping draft, but how to deliver the milk saucers? Then a vision of Hailong’s mangled body came back to me! Aha! These kitties liked chew-toys!

I rushed to my store and grabbed some materials. To be on the safe side, I tried different approaches: big balls of wool with sleeping draughts, and different coloured balls of wool with catnip and poison. If they don’t chew on the sleepy-balls, then the catnip should get their attention and the poison should at least slow them down.

Success again! You have chosen well where to place your patronage!

The catnip balls were the most popular so that the big softies ended up fighting over them to their own demise. Although doing good is its own reward, expenses were incurred, and I believe you will agree that it is for the good of all that there are no giant striped cats running around town eating paying customers – please find attached a list of expenses. Gratuities and other small tokens of appreciation are also welcome.

I include a sleeping-cap for your wife knitted from the sleeping-draught wool. This should help with your esteemed wife’s insomnia. This should enable you as well to not disturb her sleep when you visit Hailong’s attractive young cousins as your wife should sleep until the cap is removed.
Disclaimer: Permanent use of the sleeping cap not advisable. Side effects may include drowsiness and cat allergies.

Your faithful servant,

Demeanour Schnäppchen


Belicht Dionysus